Five tips to be more Calmer

Published on 3 June 2024 at 11:07

1. Focus on What You Can Control

One of the fundamental teachings of Stoicism is the distinction between what we can control and what we cannot. According to Epictetus, a prominent Stoic philosopher, we should focus our energy on our thoughts, actions, and reactions, which are within our control. External events, other people's actions, and outcomes are beyond our control. By accepting this, we can avoid unnecessary stress and anxiety.

Practical Steps:

  • Make a list of things that worry you. Identify which are within your control and which are not.
  • Develop a habit of reminding yourself to let go of what you cannot control.
  • Focus on improving your responses to situations rather than trying to change the situations themselves.

 

2. Practice Mindfulness and Presence

Stoicism encourages mindfulness and being present in the moment. Marcus Aurelius, the Roman Emperor and Stoic philosopher, often reflected on the importance of living in the present. Worrying about the past or the future only disrupts our inner peace.

Practical Steps:

  • Set aside time each day for mindfulness meditation.
  • Use prompts or reminders to bring your focus back to the present moment.
  • Engage fully in whatever you are doing, whether it's work, a conversation, or a leisure activity.

 

3. Reflect on Your Mortality

The Stoic practice of memento mori—remembering our mortality—can seem morbid, but it is actually a powerful tool for calmness. Recognizing that life is finite helps us appreciate each moment and prioritize what truly matters.

Practical Steps:

  • Take a few minutes each day to contemplate your mortality and what you value most in life.
  • Let this reflection guide your decisions and interactions.
  • Use this awareness to let go of trivial concerns and focus on meaningful pursuits.

 

4. Embrace Discomfort

Stoicism teaches us to build resilience by embracing discomfort rather than avoiding it. This can include physical challenges, mental exercises, or voluntary discomforts, such as fasting. By willingly facing challenges, we become more adaptable and less disturbed by unexpected hardships.

Practical Steps:

  • Introduce small voluntary discomforts into your routine, like taking cold showers or fasting for a day.
  • Challenge yourself with tasks that push your limits.
  • View obstacles as opportunities to strengthen your character and resilience.

 

5. Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude

Gratitude is a key component of Stoic philosophy. By appreciating what we have rather than focusing on what we lack, we can cultivate a sense of contentment and calm. Seneca, another prominent Stoic, often wrote about the importance of gratitude.

Practical Steps:

  • Keep a gratitude journal and write down three things you are grateful for each day.
  • Reflect on the positive aspects of your life, especially during challenging times.
  • Express gratitude to others regularly.

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